Who is responsible for our life? Ourselves, of course. The thing is, taking full responsibility for our own life is easier said than done. It is often proven difficult. Yet, without taking responsibility, we will not be able to turn from victim to victor in life. Here, we tell you some ways to help you take responsibility for your life.
1. Don’t Play the Blame Game
If you want to take responsibility for your life, the first thing to do is to stop blaming. What makes blaming bad? Blaming others removes your agency, showing that you are not in control of your life. You are putting yourself as a victim, which in some cases, might be true.
Still, blaming others will not help you improve your situation. In fact, doing so will make you feel powerless, resentful, and bitter. None of these help.
What you should understand is that not blaming others doesn’t mean you ignore the hardships of life or justify other’s wrong actions. Stopping blaming others only means you reclaim your agency, your freedom, and your power in your life.
2. No Excuses
The second way is to stop making excuses. Like blaming others, making excuses doesn’t help us to improve our situation. It might make it worse, however. Making excuses doesn’t allow you to see your mistakes. And if you can’t see your mistakes, you can’t learn from them.
Making mistakes is an inevitable part of life. What matters is that we take a lesson from it. If you are aiming to grow as a person, you need personal accountability. Without it, we can’t grow as a person. You will be stuck in the same spot, unable to move forward.
People who succeed in life don’t make excuses. They take full responsibility for their what they think and do. So, whenever you catch yourself making an excuse, remind yourself that no excuse is allowed.
3. Stop Complaining
Complaining is also a bad habit that prevents you from taking responsibility for your life. When you complain, you put yourself as a powerless victim who has no choice. This is, of course, incorrect. The truth is, you are not powerless, you are not a victim, and you do have choices.
If something goes wrong, rather than complain, take a step back and think about it. Try to find the bigger picture of the situation. There is always a “gift” in any situation, after all. Ask yourself these:
- What is the “gift” in this situation?
- What lesson can I learn from it?
4. Do Not Take Anything Personally
Thinking everything is about you is not only incorrect but also detrimental to your mental well-being. If you think everything is about you, you will make anything personal. The slightest hint of disagreement can seem like a personal attack.
This can hinder you from growing as you might translate criticism, something that we all need to grow, as a personal attack. There is also the fact that we will never be able to control how other people respond. We have control over how we respond, though.
So, don’t take anything personally. More likely than not, it is about the issue at hand and not about you. Don’t make assumptions. Ask questions instead. You will find that this is a liberating practice that can help you grow as a person.
5. Live in the Moment
The past is already gone. The future is yet to come. What we have is now. Yes, life is now, this moment. Instead of living in the past or the future, live in the present moment. Take responsibility for this moment. Make the best of it.
Living in the present also means that you need to be the gatekeeper of your own thoughts. In each and every moment, choose your thoughts carefully.
The more you do this, the more aware you are of what you are feeling and thinking at the present. Eventually, you will be able to interrupt present thoughts that don’t serve you.
6. Your Intention Matters
Always remember that you have a choice, that you have the power to choose. After all, we make choices all the time, even if we are unaware of it. So much so that not making a choice is making a choice, too.
Knowing that we make choices all the time, it is better to do it intentionally than not. Your intention matters. It will direct you to the life you want. By living intentionally, you are taking responsibility for your own life as you move forward toward the life you want.
7. Make Yourself Happy
When you take responsibility for your life, that also means you are responsible for your own happiness. Initially, this is not easy. But you will realize that doing so is quite liberating.
You will realize that your happiness comes from within, not without. Things like child, partner, parent friend or job are not responsible for your happiness. You are. To be happy is a decision and you want to choose it.
8. Accepting Negative Emotions
This is difficult to accept but negative emotions are an inevitable part of life. Sure, no one wants to experience such emotions but we all do from time to time. When you want to take responsibility for your life, you must be responsible for your emotions too.
Accept your emotions, including the negative ones. Doing so shows that you are responsible for your own well-being. You are being honest with yourself.
9. Love Yourself
Lastly, love yourself. It can be very difficult to take responsibility if you don’t love yourself. So one of the ways to taking full responsibility for your life is to love yourself.
When you love yourself, you will not have any choice but to take full responsibility for your life. After all, this is your life and you are entirely responsible for it. It is up to you to decide your future and make it real.
As we have shown above, there are various ways to take responsibility for our life. It might not be easy, but like anything worth doing, the reward is great. Taking responsibility for your own life means you are in control of your life. It means putting your destiny into your hands, not anyone else’s.